Loneliness During the Holiday Season: Tips for Spending Thanksgiving Alone in Recovery

Loneliness During the Holiday Season: Tips for Spending Thanksgiving Alone in Recovery
Table of Contents

Key Takeaways: 

  • Loneliness in recovery is common during Thanksgiving: Changes in social circles, family strain, and cultural pressure to appear happy can make the holiday emotionally challenging.

  • Loneliness increases relapse risk: Feeling isolated affects the brain and body, heightening stress, cravings, and emotional vulnerability.

  • Practical coping strategies: Plan your day, connect with sober peers virtually or by phone, practice gratitude, volunteer, and prioritize self-care to protect your sobriety.

  • Reframe the holiday and seek support: Focus on reflection, personal growth, and recovery routines; join support groups, build sober connections, and seek professional help if feelings of sadness or isolation become overwhelming.

Question: 

What should I do if I’m alone on Thanksgiving? 

Answer: 

Thanksgiving can be a difficult time for people in recovery, especially those who are newly sober. Emotional distance from others, separation from loved ones, and changes in social circles can make the holiday feel isolating. Family conflict or grief and societal pressure to appear happy can intensify these feelings, and loneliness itself has a measurable impact on the brain and body, increasing stress and relapse risk. However, spending the holiday alone doesn’t have to be negative. Practical strategies can help protect sobriety and foster connection, such as planning the day with meaningful activities, reaching out to peers or family virtually, practicing gratitude in a realistic way, volunteering to give back, and engaging in self-care.

Thanksgiving is often painted as a time of family, warmth, and celebration. For many, it’s a day filled with large gatherings, shared meals, and cherished traditions. But if you’re in recovery—especially early recovery—this holiday can feel very different. You might experience emotional or mental distance from others because of your sobriety. You may also be physically separated from loved ones due to treatment, travel, or changing relationships. For many people new to recovery, Thanksgiving highlights just how different life looks now compared to years past.

But spending Thanksgiving alone doesn’t mean the day has to be empty, painful, or meaningless. It simply means you have a chance to reimagine what this holiday can be. You have the opportunity to create new, healthy traditions that align with your recovery and your well-being.

This guide will help you understand why loneliness may feel amplified during Thanksgiving—and offer practical, compassionate strategies to help you protect your sobriety and find comfort, connection, and purpose throughout the day.

Why Thanksgiving Can Feel Lonely in Recovery

Thanksgiving is emotionally loaded, and recovery adds extra layers that many people don’t fully understand. Even though countless individuals spend the holidays in treatment or navigating sobriety, your experience is unique—and navigating it differently than before can be challenging.

Here are some of the most common reasons the holiday may feel lonely:

1. Shifts in Social Circles

Recovery naturally reshapes your daily life. You might be physically away from familiar people and places, or you may have intentionally stepped back from old environments tied to substance use. While your recovery peers can become a meaningful support system, you may not yet feel fully connected—especially if you’re still building your sober network.

This gap can make the holidays feel particularly isolating.

2. Family or Relationship Strain

Holidays tend to intensify complicated emotions around family—whether they’re present, distant, supportive, or estranged. Grief, conflict, disconnection, or unresolved issues can heighten feelings of loneliness. Emotional pain tends to hit harder during days that are “supposed” to feel warm and joyful.

3. Pressure to Feel Grateful and Happy

Thanksgiving comes with strong cultural messages about gratitude and cheerfulness. You may feel pressure to appear positive even if you’re struggling. Seeing others celebrate or post picture-perfect holiday scenes can deepen the sense of being out of sync.

Gratitude is a powerful tool—but it doesn’t cancel out real emotions. It’s okay to be honest about how you feel, even on a day centered around gratefulness.

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How Loneliness Increases Relapse Risk

Loneliness isn’t “just a feeling”—it affects your body, brain, and stress response. Research shows that loneliness activates the amygdala, heightening fear responses and increasing stress hormones. This can leave you feeling physically tense, mentally foggy, and emotionally vulnerable.

Because of this, loneliness can make cravings and relapse triggers stronger. When you feel overwhelmed, your brain may automatically reach for old coping mechanisms.

Recognizing loneliness early—and caring for yourself proactively—is one of the most powerful ways to protect your sobriety.

Practical Ways to Cope with Loneliness on Thanksgiving

If you’re feeling isolated this Thanksgiving, these strategies can help you stay grounded, connected, and sober.

1. Plan Ahead

A structured day helps prevent boredom and rumination—two major relapse triggers. Ask yourself:

  • What would make this day feel comforting?

  • What activities would feel meaningful or soothing?

Plan out meals, calls with loved ones, meetings, outdoor time, or projects. Treat it like a “choose-your-own holiday” designed just for you.

2. Connect Virtually or by Phone

Even if you’re physically alone, you don’t have to be emotionally alone. Many support groups offer holiday meetings, both in-person and online, including:

  • Alcoholics Anonymous (AA)

  • Narcotics Anonymous (NA)

  • SMART Recovery

  • LifeRing Secular Recovery

Reach out to peers, sober friends, support mentors, or family members who lift you up.

3. Practice Gratitude—Gently

Gratitude is powerful, but it’s not meant to invalidate your feelings. Try making a small gratitude list focused on simple but meaningful things: personal growth, a safe place to live, recovery milestones, your support system, or moments of peace.

Let gratitude be grounding—not performative.

4. Volunteer or Give Back

Helping others can bring purpose, connection, and perspective. You might:

  • Serve meals at a local shelter

  • Deliver groceries or food baskets

  • Join a community holiday event

  • Donate items

  • Send supportive messages to others spending the holiday alone

Acts of service are healing—especially when you’re struggling.

5. Treat Yourself with Compassion

Let Thanksgiving become a day of intentional self-care. There’s no rulebook saying you must celebrate traditionally. Instead, try:

  • Watching your comfort movies

  • Cooking a favorite dish

  • Reading

  • Taking a long walk

  • Doing calming activities like journaling or stretching

Your feelings are valid. Speak to yourself with kindness.

6. Lean on Your Recovery Routine

Even on holidays, your recovery tools are there for you. Attend a meeting, journal, meditate, read supportive literature, or call your sponsor. Consistency brings calm, and staying connected helps you stay grounded.

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Reframing the Meaning of Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving doesn’t have to be defined by who is—or isn’t—around you. At its core, the holiday is about reflection, gratitude, and renewal. With quiet, solitude, or a slower pace, you may even discover a more meaningful connection to yourself.

Reframing the day can transform loneliness into intentional stillness, healing, and growth.

Building Connection Beyond Thanksgiving

Loneliness can appear at any time, not just during the holidays. As you move through the rest of the season, consider:

  • Joining support groups or community programs

  • Building your sober social circle

  • Planning ahead for Christmas or New Year’s

  • Continuing to explore new traditions and routines

Recovery is much easier—and more joyful—with people beside you.

When to Seek Professional Support

If loneliness or sadness becomes overwhelming, it may be time to reach out for professional help. Signs you might need extra support include:

  • Persistent sadness or hopelessness

  • Withdrawing from people or activities

  • Sleep changes or constant fatigue

  • Mental fogginess

  • Neglecting self-care

  • Feeling empty or “other”

  • Difficulty coping with cravings

  • Feeling emotionally stuck or overwhelmed

Depression and substance use often overlap, especially during the holidays. Treatment, therapy, and structured support can help you regain stability and feel more connected and capable.

Make This Thanksgiving a Meaningful One

If you remember one thing, let it be this: spending Thanksgiving alone does not mean you’re forgotten, failing, or falling behind. Many people spend holidays on their own—and it can be an opportunity, not a setback. If things get overwhelming, Aliya can help

Recovery is about progress, self-discovery, and finding peace within yourself. This Thanksgiving, you have the chance to create a day that truly supports your healing.

Medical Reviewer
David Szarka, medical reviewer

David Szarka, MA, LCADC Medical Reviewer

David Szarka, MA, LCADC, reviews and approves our blog content. With extensive experience providing clinical care for individuals recovering from addiction and mental health challenges, David ensures our content is accurate, insightful, and rooted in culturally competent care.

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